UC ESSAYS ADMITTED TO UCLA Sarah ONeill Supreme Editing

 Sarah ONeill Supreme Editing

Application reviewers only get 1,400 words to learn about you. This may seem like a lot, but fitting your life into four short responses can be tough. That’s why with so few words, it’s crucial you present diversity in the content. You can do this by picking questions very different from each other or mixing your accomplishments into other prompts. Whatever you choose to do, remember: diversifying is key.

What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?250-350 words

SAMPLE

I’ve always drawn power from books. From the moment I could comprehend the written word, fictional characters have influenced me. The eight-year-old me dreamt that I could wave my fingers like Harry Potter’s wand and transport myself to wondrous places. Amazed by their “powers”, I mused about how to fulfill my dreams through whimsical means.As I got older, my readings expanded in scope. Rather than dreaming of unattainable powers, I drew more realistic strength from my books. For example, at twelve, when my parents said that I couldn’t ski in the Moguls because it was too dangerous “for a girl,” but not for my brother, I became Jo from Little Women who refused to give up her liberty to “any mortal man.” I told them that if my brother could do it, I could too. Insisting that I was advanced enough to take care of myself, it was my ninth year skiing after all, I took the most challenging trail. Sure, I ended up crashing into a tree, but it was an inevitable part of trying something new. It instilled my resolve to defy expectations.I then realized that my own “powers” included determination. I didn’t apply it to mere recreation, either. When the Ukraine crisis began, I formed a drive to raise money for refugees; I contacted local grocers to see if they could donate gift cards. Initially, I was turned away, yet I continuously contacted them until they noticed my determination and lent their aid. When I clicked the “send” button on the donation page, the line “when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it” from The Alchemist echoed in my ears.No longer do I fantasize about adventures in distant lands through whimsical means, but rather I search in the volumes for the “powers” that now weave together who I am, using them to augment myself in the here and now. My voracious talent for reading, interpreting, and absorbing texts has made me the hero of my own life - breaking boundaries and exploring every possibility of who I will become.

Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.

My community is made up of black and white stones.In Go, an ancient Chinese board game that uses black and white stones, I’m the President of the American Go Honor Society. Recently, our group received an email from player Albert who reported that his opponent had used AI in their moves. Before long, another email pinged from the opponent’s father, relaying that Albert slandered his son's name. Swiftly calling a meeting with the VP and the Tournament Director, we ran through AI and confirmed that the player did not cheat. However, we had to address these concerns. While the VP thought that we should approach Albert for not handling the situation appropriately, the TD wanted to warn his opposition about not using suspicious moves.After listening to their suggestions, I thought: how could we maintain justice while protecting their passion for the game? As a senior, I needed to ensure that my fellow officers were equipped to handle something like this in the future. Leading the discussion, I pointed out that while Albert certainly could have handled the situation better, we also need to understand his feelings after he lost the game. I asked the VP that since we already confirmed that his opponent did not cheat, then wouldn’t warning him deflate his desire to play? Together, we introduced a third option that combined the two with a compromise. Sending out our judgment, I expressed sincere hope that no one would be discouraged from playing GO.Addressing Albert’s concerns, I advised him to request a video call in the future and to report issues to us only. With the hope of providing a respectful, competitive environment, after our discussion, we implemented a required video call in our tournament rules to avoid potential conflicts. I was happy to lead this endeavor and to address everyone’s concerns which demonstrated the importance of communication – both within the team and with the players so conflicts could be peacefully resolved. Helping the VP and the TD rethink their solutions, I ensured the fellow officers would gain the necessary skills to keep our mission GOing.

Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.

As a feminist, I challenge gender biases. Growing up watching my father leave for work in business attire while my mother headed to the kitchen to cook rice noodles, the desire to understand why men and women are so much the same yet so different is strong. For three years, my research on gender in US politics, where gender biases are more salient, revealed that women are influenced by their gender identities. When running for president in 2016, Hillary Clinton received more media coverage about her smile and wardrobe choices than her beliefs and successes. In a twist, researchers categorize this phenomenon as women’s “disempowerment” but as a female growing up, I have been taught to pay attention to my appearance.While researching, I reflected upon my daily interactions. For instance, upon reading Professor Lakoff’s classic work, Language and a Woman’s Place, I discovered that what exists in “women’s speech” is characterized by but not limited to the preponderance of tag questions, compound requests, attentiveness to trivial matters such as making more precise discrimination in naming colors than men, etc. We’re conditioned to adopt styles that imply lack of power. My research exposed me to the subtle gender biases that once slipped by me undetected: how was Clinton’s tough persona a product of voters’ expectations of what a qualified candidate looks like? The desire to understand these social constructs is why I am taking Beyond the Binary: Gender in Literature as my English course. It’s to expand my knowledge of how our gender identity influences how we study text and to understand myself and my lived experiences through social constructs.Through class discussion, I also learn from my classmates’ experiences– many of whom identify as part of the LGBTQ+ community. We discuss the stigmas society has towards people whose gender expression and sexuality do not conform with the norm. In college, by majoring in mathematics and gender studies, I hope to continue to challenge these tropes. I will bring my knowledge of social-constructed gender norms to the mathematical field, challenging the assumption men are better in the STEM field.

Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you a strong candidate for admission to the University of California?

When the wind is soft, I bear off to increase the power of my sail, conversing with sailors about how to make my boat faster. When the wind is heavy, I slack the mainsheet and pitch up with the gusts. Today, I share my skills with inexperienced sailors struggling to keep their boats from keeling over, and we have gained a mutual respect for each other and the sea during these challenging times. I belong to a community of wind chasers.If you look from the cliffs that frame the Bohai Sea, beneath the colorful sails, we seafarers read the wind and the waves, making vital adjustments to our sails and centerboards. Our shared love of sailing has fostered our relationships, defined teamwork, and is our source of inspiration. When I switched from a single-person boat to a keelboat, the meaning of this community changed. I now require at least a six-person crew, and communication is essential as we learn not to accidentally bump into each other. As crew captain, my quiet confidence is the force behind my management. Before I make moves, such as turning the sailboat around, I update my crew ahead of time so they can complete their individual tasks. From making sure we check what’s in front of us to pulling the sail, I have to be prepared the moment we leave the dock. I have to ensure every teammate is truly a part of the whole.My sail and the wind’s energy propel me to my next voyage at the University of California, both as a potential member of the sailing team and as a student. As a sailor who has to collaborate with the wind, I’ll bring my concentration and patience during situations when I’m out of control. A member of the six-person keelboat team, I’ll add to the UC community my ability to work with others. As I prepare for challenges, I truly believe, “We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails to our destined point.”

Sarah ONeill Supreme Editing